Hello, everybody. This is Lois Lane Miami, and you are listening to the Purple Kool-Aid Podcast. Today, I want to talk about unforgiving perfect people. These are individuals who believe they’re perfect or know everything and think that everyone else, especially those who don’t agree with them, are stupid, uninformed, uneducated, ignorant, or whatever you choose to call it. In other words, they think very highly of their opinions and believe their opinions are facts.

The funny thing about this is that I have learned that people who believe their opinions are facts typically have no explanation or evidence for such beliefs; they just think they know everything. So, what prompted this podcast on unforgiving perfect people, and I think I forgot to mention, they’re also unforgiving. Meaning that not only do they think they know everything or believe they are right, but they are also unforgiving. If you are someone who has made a mistake in the past or has been wrong and are attempting to better yourself or correct your mistakes, or just be a better person in general, they are very unforgiving about it. They have an attitude that you have made a mistake, a grave mistake, and how dare you make a mistake as if they’re perfect, and you should pay for this for eternity. Their attitude is almost as if you’re not allowed to change, grow, evolve, or become a better person.

These people also have a lot of skeletons in their closets and have made mistakes and done things they’re not proud of, but many of them are very good at hiding it. I have not met a human being yet who was perfect or who did not do something that they should not have done or could’ve done better. But these people have been very savvy at hiding their imperfections and pointing their fingers at others.

One of those people I have listened to, and some of the things she has said, I have agreed with. I am not a person who feels like you have to throw away the whole baby with the bathwater, so I realize that no one is all the way right and no one is typically all the way wrong. I believe you can learn something from anyone, even if you feel you’re smarter than them, which a lot of people do. You can still learn from a person. And you should always be learning. Learning helps you grow and increases the amount of wisdom and knowledge you have—the more you listen and pay attention to others, read, and observe, etc.

The unforgiving perfect person I am referring to is Candace Owens. Yes, Candace Owens is an unforgiving perfect person, but there are things about her that I admire. I admire that she is very courageous, does not back down, and there are times when I believe it is good to be courageous and not back down if you firmly believe in something and have researched it and have good reasons to believe so. Or maybe even if you haven’t, if you firmly believe in something, it does what you believe, then you have a right to believe. But when you try to push your belief on other people, that’s when there is a problem. When you are simply putting people down just to be putting people down, as if there is absolutely nothing about you that is not perfect, that to me is a very big problem.

So I came across this video, and I know I keep starting and stopping, but as I said, there are some of her views and some of her things that I do agree with, and there are others that I totally do not agree with. I’m going to be a little bit prejudiced and say that I am happy to see a black woman, or a woman of color, or minority, or just about any woman, as long as they aren’t harming people, become successful because it is difficult for women to break barriers. It is even more difficult for minority women to break down barriers to become ultra-successful, to become famous, to gain power, or to be in any position where they have thousands or hundreds of thousands or tens of thousands of people paying any attention whatsoever to what they have to say, whether those people agree with it or not.

I like the fact that I am seeing more women, and especially more minority women, in positions of power, as long as they don’t abuse that power because no matter who you are, abusing power is not good, harming people is not good, harming the environment, etc., you know the rest that goes with that. No matter who you are, if you are harmful, it is not good, and I think we can all agree on that, and even if we don’t, that’s one stand that I’m stick with. If you are a person who harms, you are not good and should not be in any position of power.

Anyway, I was scrolling through my YouTube videos, and I saw a video of Candace Owens and then I also saw Cardi B included in this video. I thought they had done some type of interview together, but upon checking further, I found out that no, this was not an interview. It was Candace Owens going in on Cardi B because Cardi B went in on Candace Owens. And then, as I looked even further, I found out that this had to do with the Sonia Macy situation, the black woman who was gunned down in her living room and shot in the face by a police officer, which really bothered me. But I’m not going to get into too much of that because today we’re talking about unforgiving perfect people.

So Cardi B was suggesting that Candace Owens should not have made any comments at all about that situation in the way that Candace made comments. That she probably should have just shown sympathy or empathy for the situation and just left it alone. Because she always has something to say, and sometimes it is better to just not say anything or show empathy, in some situations, some of the time.

Now of course, we all know Cardi B. Why? Because I am a former female rapper who did a little bit in the music business, was an album that went gold. We know that artists do not express themselves the same way that the average human being does. They are very passionate about the things that they say because if they were not passionate, they would never become famous. This is who they are, and then Cardi B is loud, very expressive, and passionate. She also says things exactly how she wants to say them and doesn’t really care how she says them. However, I have also noticed that she seems to be a caring person who cares about what happens to people, and she seems to me like she has a good heart.

Knowing the music business and knowing how far she has gotten, no matter what mistakes she has made, her situation she has been in, I also know that she is an intelligent woman because you have to be very savvy and intelligent to navigate your way to the top in the music business, the movie industry, and anything like that. You also have to be extremely savvy and intelligent to be nominated as a presidential candidate. You also have to be very savvy and intelligent to be able to create the number of followers and listeners on a platform such as the one Candace Owens has created for herself, for the following that she has created, and you have to break down billions of barriers and gatekeeper when you are a woman of color. It is a monstrosity to become anyone in any position where anyone will listen to anything that you have to say at all, so to me, all these women have done well for themselves, and the fact that they have achieved the amount of success that they have makes me happy.

Now, without needing to diagnose the situation, I’m not sure what diagnosing or clinical findings or probabilities needed to be figured out, but the fact of the matter is, there was an unarmed woman in her living room who called the cops, and she was unable to defend herself, and she was shot in her face. So I really don’t care what the circumstances were, and in that situation, I feel that empathy is paramount, probably paramount, or necessary, maybe.

So, Cardi B was upset and said something about that. Now the funny thing is that if you listen to Cardi B’s response, at no point did she ever put Candace down, she never, and I’m sure there’s a lot of things that Cardi B probably doesn’t like about Candace, but she never talked about her, never said anything, never threw shots at Candace when she simply said that maybe she or she probably should’ve just kept her damn mouth shut, and I agree, she probably should have. On the other hand, Candace Owens gets back on with a response, it was funny because it seemed like more than focusing on responding back to what Cardi B said, or offering I don’t know what, conversation or commentary on back, you know, heading back at Cardi B, the main focus of her commentary, and her being Candace Owens was where Cardi B came from, the fact that she used to be a stripper, what she’s going through, that she probably or that she’s stupid or she isn’t intelligent, and how she feels sorry for her, and that the music industry is just using her, and all this ridiculous stuff, kind of insinuating that Cardi B is stupid, and saying she was, she insinuated and she said it.

Now, people have a habit of feeling like, and they like to feel like because someone doesn’t have the education or is not as well-spoken as them, or doesn’t dress like them or walk like them or talk like them, that that has anything to do with an amount of intelligence or level of intelligence, and I’m here to tell you, there’s something else. The afterworld, world, will you wait, now I’m just kidding, that came from Prince, but there is something else, sometimes I get off track, so intelligence is not, never has been, and never will be tied to upbringing. Knowledge comes from education, wisdom does not come from education, and intelligence does not come from education.

The ability to survive does not come from education; these are things that people learn on their own. Now, you can learn to survive from some education, and education I mean, this could be used loosely, you can definitely sit down and read a book on how to survive in the wild. And one of them could have gone to Harvard and got a PhD, and the other one could be doomed to a certain set of circumstances and ended up babysitting and taking care of their siblings all their lives, living in the hood with little to no resources, and that person could actually be more intelligent than that person that went to Harvard University. This is due to a set of circumstances and their situation and their environment; it has nothing to do with their intelligence. Okay, they can figure out things, some people who have never had the opportunity to go to college are extremely intelligent, and I know no one’s gonna wanna agree with this, and no one is going to like it, and yada yada yada, and I really don’t care, but implying that Cardi B is stupid because of the way that she talks and the way that she walks in because she is an entertainer is ridiculous, it’s totally ridiculous, you have to be extremely savvy and intelligent, and you need to be a strategist. To a strategist who plays chess or any type of game or a person who holds any position of power, you are not going to achieve any level of success or any position of power without being strategic, having a strategy, having a blueprint, having a plan, and just because someone’s strategy was to be successful in the music business versus having a Harvard law degree, or being a super Christian, doesn’t mean they are not intelligent.

Candace Owens has no evidence of Cardi B not being intelligent. We have no idea whether someone is using her, or she is using them to get what she wants; we’re just assuming because she is a woman and because she is black that she is naïve, which is funny because that is the same way that Candace Owens is looking at Cardi B, is the same way that everyone is looking at Candace Owens like she is naïve, and like because she is a black woman.

The other funny thing is, Candace and always going at Kamala Harris’s neck, and I’m probably saying her name wrong, and I do apologize if I am, so we’re gonna say Vice President Harris, the irony and hypocrisy of Candice Owens going at Vice President Harris’s neck is ridiculous because the same way that people are looking at her like a childless cat lady who is married to a white man that they have no respect for is the exact same way, whether she would like to acknowledge it or not, or the exact same prejudices that are being held against Candace Owens, but Candace Owens is choosing not to acknowledge who she is and the way that people are looking at her, and that’s okay, it’s okay because she’s focused, so sometimes we don’t acknowledge what’s going on around them, or that I should say, not what’s going on around them, she’s very aware of what’s going on around her, but she’s not acknowledging the negative, because if she were to stop and acknowledge the negative, she would not stay focused if she took those blinders off, and she probably would not be able to achieve the amount of success and have the followers that she does have, so this is a thing that works for her, and something that we need to realize is that different things work for different people, and that’s okay, different strategies work for different people, but my problem with this is when people pretend like they’re perfect, and they have the only strategy out there, and then they assume that everyone else is naïve, and then when they go to fight back during a debate, the only thing they can talk about is that this person is a childish cat lady, or that this person is ignorant or stupid because they were once a stripper.

Which brings me to another point, people will sit there and say oh this person isn’t shit because they used to be a drug dealer, they used to be a stripper, they got in trouble in high school, who do they think they are now being successful. And moving on from that, and they don’t say it like that, they just go old whenever someone who used to be a drug dealer or who used to be a stripper becomes famous or successful, or people gain some type of respect for them, here comes these perfect unforgiving people saying oh they used to be a stripper, don’t listen to them, they used to be a drug dealer, don’t listen to them, as if they’re mad that these people evolved.

Why are you mad that somebody used to be a stripper and now they’re not, why are you mad that somebody used to be a drug dealer and now they’re not, would you have preferred that they stayed a stripper, would you have preferred that they stayed a drug dealer, would you have preferred that they kept getting in trouble and they never tried to do better?

I don’t understand this, so at one point you were just a college student that nobody knew and nobody ever heard of, I am sure, 100% sure, that if you weren’t that savvy at hiding your mistakes that you made some mistakes too, and you did some things that you’re not proud of, everyone has done something that they are not proud of, why are people so unforgiving now, I’m not talking about people who are going out there and murdering people, murder is not forgiving unless it was in self-defense, and I’m not gonna get too much into that because I can open up a whole can of worms, if someone’s trying to hurt you and you end up murdering them in self-defense, or to protect your mother, your sister, for protection, that’s a whole different thing, but besides murders and pedophiles and rapist, are people not allowed to evolve and do better, are they not, do you want them to keep doing those things?

And if you don’t, then why in the hell every time somebody does better, the first thing you bring up about them in a debate or an argument is not the things that they’re fucking up now, or the things that they’re not doing right, or in their positions of power or success, are the things from 10 years ago that they’ve grown out of, as if you’ve never grown out of anything, you’ve never evolved, you’ve never made a mistake, you are human, you have made mistakes, everybody doesn’t know about all y’all’s mistakes because you weren’t important enough or relevant enough to know about your mistakes.

Maybe you knew how to keep your mouth shut, maybe you were quiet, maybe no one was paying attention to you at all, but you made mistakes, and you did stupid shit, and you fucked up, and now you’re doing better, so isn’t it great to be celebrated that someone who wasn’t who was in trouble, who was poor, who was fucked up, who was a stripper, nobody grows up and is like oh yeah I can’t wait to be a fucking stripper, I mean well they doing until they figure out what the lifestyle is like, they’re like oh these chicks are making a whole lotta money, and then they get it in it, and they’re like damn how can I get out of this.

People who are selling drugs, a lot of them were trying to get in a position so that they can buy everything for their families so they won’t be in the hood anymore, and no that’s not all of them, but a lot of people who are selling drugs and stripping would like to be doing other things, but their situations, and they didn’t have two family households, right, and they weren’t able to go to college, and they were being abused, or they were taking care of their brothers and sisters, or they grew up on welfare, you know, and some people just decide to do the wrong thing, but you have also done the wrong thing.

I haven’t met a perfect fucking human being in the 57 years that I’ve been on this planet, and we won’t even count the first five years because I wouldn’t have known, but after five years of age, and I listen, and talk to, and observe, I’ve been fucking observing people since I was five years old and watching them, and I have never met a fucking perfect person yet, I am not perfect, Candace Owens, you are not perfect, Cardi B’s not perfect, she knows it, she has the courage to say I’m not perfect, Vice President Harris is not perfect, none of these motherfuckers are perfect.

Donald Trump is not perfect, he knows that, he’s one person that will say I’m not fucking perfect, but you are also not perfect, and it is okay for people to not be perfect, and it is okay for people to make mistakes, and it is okay for people to not come from squeaky clean backgrounds with two parent Christian mothers, parent and guardians, and make some fucking mistakes, and then change their lives and be better people, it is okay, and I’m sick and tired of people making it not okay, so if you’re going to go back-and-forth with someone, don’t take preschool jabs, saying somebody used to be a stripper is a fucking preschool jab, assuming that someone is not intelligent that you know absolutely nothing about and you’ve never given a fucking IQ test too, you couldn’t survive half a fucking day in their shoes in the environment that they grew up in and become as successful in the type of on the type of platform that they have and have gone through the shit that they went through, you couldn’t make it.

It doesn’t matter who is worth more money, and who is doing better, and who has a more squeaky clean background because every person that I have met who was an unforgiving perfect person if you go on their house and you open up their closet, the skeletons, and that’s all I have to say on that today.

Thank you for tuning in to Lois Lane Miami on the Purple Kool-Aid Podcast, this was unforgiving perfect people, you can hear more on Spotify, on Apple podcast, on iHeartRadio. Have a great rest of your week.