Hello everybody, this is Lois Lane and The Purple Kool-Aid Podcast, and today I wanna talk to you about a group that I consider to be an invasive species—and that is Christians.
So, this podcast is titled Christians: The Invasive Species, and I wanna get into why I feel like they are an invasive species.
What is an Invasive Species?
An invasive species is something that enters an area, infiltrates it, and causes everything that was already there to diminish. It takes over, it is aggressive, it causes harm, and it has no regard for anything else around it. That’s what makes something invasive—it multiplies, invades, and overtakes without concern for what was originally in place.
So, I want to talk about why I believe Christians fit this description, based on my experience of 50+ years on this planet, encountering all different types of religions. I feel like Christianity is one of the most invasive, harmful, and aggressive religions out there.
Growing Up in the Church
I’m sure you guys have heard of the Inquisition and other historical events tied to Christianity. I don’t know if you’ve read books about Christianity, but I’ve read a lot.
I grew up in the church. Now, when I say that, don’t assume I was indoctrinated or had a horrible experience that I’m now trying to escape. I’m not someone who “used to believe” and is now reconstructing my faith. I consider myself somewhat agnostic or atheist. I’ve explored many different belief systems because I am a curious person. I like to test theories, observe human behavior, and see how people interact with each other in different environments.
That being said, my mother was a member of an Apostolic church in the Midwest, Columbus, Ohio. While I was exposed to different churches—Catholic, Lutheran, Protestant, Baptist—the Apostolic church was the one we belonged to.
There were things I liked about church and things I didn’t. The thing I liked most was the choir and the band. I also liked the preacher—he was a cool, charismatic man, a great speaker with great energy. He had a way of getting people to feel something, elevating their spirits, making them feel good when they left. I believe he’s still alive today, probably in his 90s now.
The Church Experience
One of my favorite parts was the music and celebrations. I remember when it was someone’s birthday, they’d pass around a little plastic cake, and people would put coins inside while singing:
“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, may you feel Jesus near every day of the year…”
I can’t sing for shit—even though I’m a rapper—but you get the idea. Everyone would be clapping, happy, and engaged. I loved that part. I even had a tambourine! Sometimes, if one was available, I’d get to use it.
Sunday School & Preaching
Now, what I didn’t like was Sunday School. I hated Sunday School. I didn’t like being preached to in that way, and I definitely didn’t like the educational part of it. Even as a child, I didn’t believe in the teachings about a “man in the sky.”
But I did enjoy watching the preacher in action. He had a deep, boisterous voice, almost like a singer—like a Martin Luther King Jr. style preacher. If you’ve never experienced that in a Black church, it’s like a powerful motivational speaker at peak intensity.
One of the most entertaining parts of the service was when people would go up for prayer or give a testimony.
The “Healing” & Praise Dance
I hated being told to go up for prayer. You’d have to stand in front of the whole church, packed with people, waiting in a long line. The preacher would put his hands on your head, maybe anoint you with olive oil in the shape of a cross, and say, “In the name of Jesus, heal your soul.”
People would cry, some would walk back to their seats, but others would get caught up in the Praise Dance.
The Praise Dance was when someone supposedly got the Holy Ghost—the spirit of God entered their body, and they would start speaking in tongues, jumping up and down, sometimes running around the church. The drummers and organ player would get louder, and before you knew it, more people would start dancing.
It was like watching a spiritual wave—one person starts, then another, then another, all moving in rhythm with the music. Women’s hats and wigs would fall off, shoes would go flying, and ushers would form a protective circle around them so they wouldn’t get hurt.
For kids, this was prime entertainment. Every Sunday, we would be waiting to see if Sister Watkins (just a random name) would go all out with her hat and dress, wondering if her wig was going to fall off this time.
Religious Indoctrination & “Tarrying”
Growing up in the Midwest, we also had Jehovah’s Witnesses and other religious groups knocking on doors, passing out pamphlets, trying to preach to us. Some people would hide to avoid them, while others would politely take the paper and shut the door.
But nothing was worse than “tarrying.” This was when kids were forced to kneel and repeatedly say “Hallelujah” until they “received” the Holy Ghost. I was forced to do this as a child, and I hated it.
After two days of chanting and getting nothing, I just faked it. I started jumping up and down, speaking gibberish, pretending I saw the light. And it worked—I was free. Meanwhile, other kids were still stuck there for days.
Experiencing Other Religions
As an adult, I explored other belief systems. I attended a Lutheran church, spent time in a mosque, dabbled in Scientology (briefly—because Isaac Hayes required it for his music label), and even had family members who converted to Islam.
One of the biggest shocks? When I lost my job and was struggling, the only religious group that helped me—without judgment—was the mosque. Christians and Catholics made me jump through hoops, questioning me before offering assistance, but the Muslims just helped.
I also noticed that while Christians are aggressive about pushing their beliefs, Muslims and Jews never tried to convert me. It was nearly impossible to get them to talk about their faith unless I asked.
Christianity as an Invasive Species
So why do I call Christianity an invasive species?
Because Christians are pushy, aggressive, and judgmental. They insist their way is the only way. They want public schools to enforce their beliefs, hospitals to accommodate their prayers, and laws to reflect their religious doctrine.
They have a history of forcing conversions, colonizing, and erasing cultures. And they still do it—disguising their mission as charity while pushing their religious agenda.
They claim to be Christlike, yet many of them lie, cheat, judge, and manipulate.
They insist on inserting religion into every conversation, demanding acknowledgment. They say, “God is my only judge,” yet they judge everyone else.
In short, Christianity operates like an invasive species—taking over, multiplying aggressively, pushing out anything that doesn’t align with it, and insisting that it’s the only thing that matters.
Final Thoughts
That’s my take on Christianity as an invasive species. I know a lot of people will have a lot to say about this, so have at it.
Thanks for tuning in to The Purple Kool-Aid Podcast. See you next time!